Got the Stuffing Knocked Out of It

Today was one of those lovely days, where I didn't have to be anywhere and I didn't have to do anything. It was one of those lovely and rare Pajama Days.

Of course, since I can only sit still for so long, I decided to combine those two things and wore my pajamas AND got some things done that have been waiting on my to-do list.

Namely, re-stuffing the pillows.

Our family is really hard on pillows. Either we have huge heads (which many of my family do, we're talking Olmec proportions, here), or I buy cheap pillows. Both are most likely true.

So, I had five, rather sad, deflated pillows. I could have just thrown them away, but of course I knew that as soon as I did, someone would need a pillow. It's Murphy's law.

So, I picked a sacrificial pillow, one that had loose stuffing, and lobotomized it. I used its innards to fluff out the other four.

 When I was done, instead of five emaciated pillows, I had four rotund pillows.

(Yes, this is probably a bit of a pointless endeavor because I could just buy pillows, but there's something satisfying about finding a way to make something last longer.)

I also made sure to label my own pillow. Someone always tries stealing it, and this way they can't claim innocence, bwahahaha! *insert evil laugh*

Feeding my Family

I've had several really good days in a row, which has resulted in a flurry of baked goods. There's something so satisfying about seeing rows upon rows of homemade raspberry poppy seed muffins.

The knowledge that my family will get to enjoy them feeds something deep in my soul. 

Maybe appreciate it. Maybe they won't. 

(Three of them are teens, after all. One is ever mindful of "the gains, Mom, I gotta watch the GAINS!" The second doesn't ever seem to be hungry when dinner is ready, and the third commicates almost entirely with grunts That could mean anything from, "This is the best food I've ever HAD!!!" to, "I would rather eat dirt".)

Still, I find such joy in getting my hands covered in flour and kneading up a fresh batch of bread for sandwiches or soup. 

It's not miraculous or marvelous, but I hope these simple acts of love feed their hearts. 

Kelp Dreams

Like so many of us poor, beleaguered insomniacs, I have explored the wide world of ways to help myself fall asleep and stay asleep and sleep deeply.

(You people in the back who don't have this problem, just shush for your own personal safety. We insomniacs might hate you. Just a little.)

Anyway, the other night I took some kelp supplements, which are supposedly high in iodine and other things that are magical and sleep-inducing.

The next morning, I woke up, having had a vivid dream in which I was interviewing one of my favorite actors, Ji Chang Wook. 

He was lovely and charming, and we quickly bonded over a light dinner of Mac and Cheese waffles which were topped with fried chicken and drizzled with a sweet Sriracha sauce glaze.

At some point during this fabulous dream, I must have fallen into a food coma (a dream within a dream?) because the next thing I "remember" was waking up to find myself alone at the table, my reporter's notebook lying forlorn and empty in front of me. I desperately flipped through the pages, hoping for some note of farewell from my favorite actor, but alas, there was none.

I awoke, thoroughly despondent and craving chicken fried waffles. 

😭😭😭😭😭

Never meet your heroes, even in your dreams. 

Rambling at the Conservatory

We are so fortunate to be part of a local homeschool group called the Ramblers. Every week, we get together and ramble about, learning about nature or exploring a new wildlife area.

A few weeks ago, Gabe and I decided to start the exploration early by rambling to one of our favorite places to eat, KBQ (Korean Bar-be-que). The spicy fried chicken is, in Gabe's words, "like dying, but worth it."

It's been awhile since I got to spend one-on-one time, with Gabe, so it was a nice afternoon. Gabe is the middle child, and exhibits many middle-child traits. Since I am also a middle-child, I can commiserate with some of his emotional struggles. 

"Wait," I can hear you saying. "Don't you have four kids? How can you have a middle child when you have four kids?"

Let me explain.

Peter is an only child. He has never acted like he has siblings, and does not acknowledge any familial relationship with them.

Bee is classic oldest child, and has a greater awareness of her siblings than their father does. (This is not a castigation against their father. She, however, knows everyone's birthdays . . .)

Ella is definitely the baby.

That leaves Gabe as 

The Man in the Middle.

Once our palates had cooled, we met up with the rest of the Ramblers at the Nicholas Conservatory and Gardens for a lovely perambulation (great word, isn't it?!) through their gorgeous facility. We've been there several times, but this was the first time to get a tour, and it was a treat. I'm so glad we went!

Gathering my Courage

Until my mobility became more limited, I never understood how much courage it took for a disabled person to just leave the house.

There's so much I took for granted that now I have to consider in detail whenever I go anywhere.

Can I get my wheelchair out by myself? (It's 50 pounds)

Will there be someone who can help me get it back in the car? What if no one's walking by? (Also, the embarrassment of having to ask a total stranger for help)

Will there be snow? Wheelchairs have wheels -- they don't maneuver well AT ALL in even the smallest dusting of snow.

What if the curbs aren't ramped? I might have to drive on the street.... (A bump of 1" is impassable for the front castors without significant help. Also, wheeling on a street when I am below sight level for any car backing up or pulling out is ... terrifying)

All this fear runs through my head parallel to the excitement of going shopping by myself. (I am an introvert. Going shopping by myself tops my list of Things To Pamper Myself)

Case in point, the other morning, I had a haircut appointment downtown. I got out my Huli-Huli (wheelchair) by myself (Yay!) and turned it on. Very low battery. (Oh no!)

Drove myself down the beautifully renovated downtown sidewalk, that has FANTASTIC ramps onto the sidewalk (Yay!) and got to my hair salon. Asked if I could charge my chair while I get my haircut. My chair won't turn back on. (Oh no!)

So here I sit, feeling conflicting emotions that batter at my courage. It's a beautiful space. The sun is shining, there is pleasant music playing and everyone is so kind.

-- but I'm stuck here if the battery is dead. 

My car is a flurrying (my personal f-word) block away, and I can't even get there. I can literally see it from where I sit. I'm close to tears. I feel so pathetic. 

But then, my husband comes to my rescue and swings by.  He takes one look at it, presses the power button, and it immediately turns on, just as it should (Yay!)

And then the full weight of my see-sawing, turbulent emotions crashes down on me, because it is at that moment I realize - I had been pressing the wrong button the whole time. 

Ugh. I'll go on more solitary excursions again, just . . . not till until after I regain some equilibrium. 

Oil Pastel Plumeria

I've been watching some interesting TikTok videos lately about using oil pastels, so I wanted to give it a try. I have trouble with landscapes, because I get too caught up in the details and I struggle with broader strokes. My hope is that using oil pastels will force me to be more "general"  in my sketching.

This was my first attempt at something, and it was really more just to get a feel for the medium.

Oil pastels are interesting. When you draw them on the paper, it looks a lot like crayons. However, they are much softer, so you can use your finger or some paper towel to smudge the colors. This makes a really cool blending effect that I really enjoyed working with.

This particular sketch isn't all great, but I didn't have high expectations for it to begin with, since it was my first attempt. 

All-in-all, I think I'll enjoy dabbling with my new hobby! 

Sunrise to Sunset

Thanks to the time difference between The Frigid North and The Islands, I usually find myself waking up with plenty of time to catch a sunrise (providing I'm near the eastern side of The Island). Today, Ella and I headed to the nearby Waimanalo Beach. 

It was quiet, with no tourists, and only the sound of the wind and waves and the occasional coo of a Morning Dove. I don't think there's any better soundtrack in the whole world. With my toes in the sand and the ocean in front of me, it's like I can feel that tight kink inside of me, the one that steadily gets tighter the longer winter goes on . . . relax.

Going from one happy place to another, after Waimanalo, we drove along the east side of The Island, until we got to Kaneohe. Hunger (and 12 months without local food) dictated we stop for breakfast. We found a charming little restaurant called Cafe Kalawe. 

Ella was happy because she got pancakes. I was happy because I got Loco Moco, which, if you haven't heard of it, is an amazing, artery-clogging combination of rice, hamburger patty, fried egg, and brown gravy. 

From there, we continued around the island, past beautiful beaches on the right and the gorgeous Ko'olau Mountains on the right. It's a long drive (about an hour), but so gorgeous. 

Our destination was Shark's Cove. Ella was hoping we would be able to snorkel there, but the wave forecast wasn't promising, and sure enough, the cove was WAY too dangerous. I don't think I've ever seen such huge waves, although I know that it's not that uncommon for this time of year.

Photos really don't do it justice. 

This is what it looked like around this time last year.

We continued onward, and stopped for awhile at Waimea Bay to catch the surfers. The Eddie Aikau tournament had ended a few days before, so the crowds weren't bad at all.

 I think the waves were about 30 feet, and the life guards had their hands full. 

Obviously, no one other than professional surfers were allowed on the beach (too dangerous).

- and, of course, there were chickens. 

We finished off the day with a spectacular sunset. Kilauea on The Big Island is currently sending over lots of Vog, so the sunsets are especially gorgeous lately. 

I'm so blessed, and my heart is full.