Wednesday, April 2, 2008

I'm Going to Hide Now

Yesterday was my favorite holiday of the entire year. What is this auspicious day? Why, April Fools!

In my family, April Fools is a wonderful event for which we scheme and plan several months in advance. This year, I have to proudly admit that I win the prize for Most Awful Family Member. Now, we try very hard not to play any practical jokes that would be mean or cause legitimate stress and woe. A leeetle bit of stress and woe, however, is perfectly acceptable.

My dear Mum I "got" by calling and telling her that I was starting to have contractions. (I'm not due until mid May). I couldn't let the farce go on for too long, because that would be mean (and therefore against the rules), but for the minute or two that it lasted, the controlled panic on her side of the phone was priceless!

My Oma and Opa I "got" by calling them and telling them that Oom Leo (Opa's brother from Holland) had called me and was on his way from the Atlanta Airport. Oom Leo is really due to arrive in a week or two, but it was fun trying to convince them that they had their date wrong! My Oma is one of the naughtiest people in my family, though, so I didn't fool her for very long.

I'm still waiting to hear if I "got" my dad or not. I made this wonderful document that my Mum was supposed to print out and put with the regular mail, but unfortunately her printer broke. So, my brother emailed it to my dad's email from an anonymous email address. Here's the document - oh, you should know that they just got back from a Caribbean Cruise (you might have to click on the picture to enlarge:
The best, however, was my Uncle Gary, one of the kingpins of practical jokes in our family. Yesterday while he was at work, I called his home phone and left a message saying that "this was Gail Watt from the Internal Revenue Service, and due to a tax filing discrepancy they were being audited for the last two years . . ." I left my home phone number for them to call. Hee hee, this morning, after stewing all night, Uncle Gary called the number and heard my nice cheery answering machine message saying, "Hi, you've reached Rachel . . . !"

He had no clue till that moment that he was the victim of a practical joke from a brilliant mind.

Ah, yes, the life of crime can be so satisfying.
I'm going to hide in a hole for the next twenty years now, or at least until my family has died off. Only then will I be safe from their retribution, and I'm not positive even then. It wouldn't surprise me to wake up 60 years from now to see Uncle Gary's ghost holding a bucket of cold water over my bed.